Sesame Street Live: Elmo Makes Music

For the third year in a row, I was conned into going to Sesame Street Live! as part of some horrific bribe that was ultimately supposed to provide the older one a chance to hang out with Mommy and Daddy without his baby sister being present.
This year it was titled Elmo Makes Music, the story of a music teacher on her first day teaching music to all of the Sesame Street freaks only to discover that the truckload of instruments has been lost, carjacked, or re-routed to Fraggle Rock. What could have been the strongest plot to work with out of the three turned out to be the weakest, thanks mostly to the lead of “Jenny,” the music teacher who never seems to be able to belt out her selections and always appears eager to have her scenes end so that she can get the fuck off stage.
Now I realize that I’m getting burnt on this shit which, in turns, attributes about 75% of the animosity projected here, but I have another reliable source (see photo) that also felt the performance sucked ass. This was gauged by the number of times I had to hear “I want some cotton candy” ($5) and “Can we get some ice cream” ($3) and “Can we get popcorn” ($2).
I have no clue how the promoters of these shows can book three performances in two days. The place wasn’t even half-full for our final night performance and I’ve got to believe the matinee from earlier that day was even more sparsely attended. No wonder Jenny wanted to leave so soon.
Even the monsters seemed to be going through the motions, with Grover sitting on his ass during one major scene in the first half, rising only to give his lines and occasionally playing grab-ass with Zoe during the moments when neither of them had speaking parts.
The girl in front of us, age guestimate about 2 and a half, cried every time Elmo left the stage. I noticed a couple of kids up in the balcony running through the aisles unsupervised, occasionally dancing, but ultimately oblivious to the retarded story line that had the monsters inexplicitly hiding their makeshift instruments from Jenny because, well, I didn’t get why they did that.
The saving grace was since Bert dressed in disco clothes and dancing to “The Hustle” and watching the kids in the audience barely pay attention while the parents fretted over them. Ethan was good, aside from the “I’m bored…let’s get some munchies” bit and it was apparent that he was getting a little too old for this shit. Even his green Oscar shirt is getting a little too tight for his wiry frame.
But then the SLF suggests that we’ll have to do it all over again for Callista which is fine, but that doesn’t mean I need to be a part of it for three years in a row. I really could have used a break from Sesame Street as this was the first year that Ethan finally got over his love of Elmo and it’s only a matter of time until Calli starts to pick up on the monsters. This would have been the perfect opportunity to get a break from Sesame Street Live! and, even judging by the performers at this year’s show, it looked as though they needed a break too.