Scorpions - Sting In The Tail

It would have been immensely cool if the Scorpions ended their career with an eye on their entire catalog-something that addresses the contribution of guitarist Uli Jon Roth, their origins with younger brother Michael Schenker, and yes, the band’s mega-platiunum acention in the 1980’s.

But when the German band announced that the tour supporting Sting In The Tail would be there last, you got the feeling that the band wasn’t going to rest too much on their nostalgia, opting instead to try and recapture the attention (and the financial gain) of their eighties heyday.

Whether or not that is entirely possible is another debate, but Sting In The Tail marks an admirable return to those glory days while also offering a bit of current shine to demonstrate that these 40 year veterans are not completely blind to the landscape around them.

Vocalist Klaus Meine uses some nasty vocal effects on the title track and the album opener “Raised On Rock” is a worthy addition to the band’s impressive collection of hook-laden songs with iconic power chords. It’s not far from the chords of “Rock You Like A Hurricane,” but then again, it sounds positively at home coming from the Scorpions.

And if you’re getting confused by all of the songs with the word “Rock” in the title, hold on. Sting In The Tail features three songs that rock so much that the band had to indentify it with the word in the title.

It’s one of those charming little things that makes it hard to attack a band like Scorpions. Clearly, their hearts are in the right place even when their subtlety isn’t.

Naturally, every album in the band’s career features some kind of power ballad, and because the band is so adept at composing them, there is very little complaining from the band’s most testosteroned supporter.

For this album, it’s “Lorelei” (not the Styx song, thank god) and the closer “The Best Is Yet To Come.” With all irony missing from that last cut, the sing-along chorus makes it hard to face reality: that its shelf life is limited to one more tour.

But all in all, Sting Of The Tail ain’t a bad way to use up the butane in your disposable lighter.

Scorpions - Virgin Killer

Let me just say, for the record, Virgin Killer has the worst cover art in history. It’s offensive. Seriously. To the point where I feel bad enough to say how awful the cover is before I write a word about the music on the grooves of Scorpions fourth album.
It’s so offensive that I want you to view it here, take a shower, and then you can resume reading the rest of this review.
Yes, it’s true: even with an album an offensive as Virgin Killer’s original cover, it was hideous enough to make me want to hear the album. I mean, I’m a fan of Love At First Sting, Blackout, Animal Magnetism and a bit of Lovedrive, so it’s not a stretch for me to at least ponder why a band like Scorpions would allow a cover like this to happen and potentially ruin their careers.
Because, and this is important, the band had yet to find an audience in the U.S. and they were poised to make an entrance here. So when they did, they were doing so on perhaps the worst way to introduce themselves.
“Hello America! We’re Scorpions! Just a band of longhaired child rapists from Germany! Who wants to rock with us?!”
When the band and/or record company (RCA, in case you want you add them to your state’s sexual offender lists) decided to change the cover, they replaced it with one of the shittiest photographs of Scorpions they could ever find and they simply had individual head shots with a caption of the band member’s names for the follow-up release Taken By Force.
So now that the cover art drama has been explained and is out of the way, it’s time to explore the grooves of this, the band’s fourth album released in early 1977.
Growing up on classic era-Scorps (’79-’89) it’s weird to hear the band in some very 70’s classic rock production as well as hearing them with a guitarist who also shares vocal duties with Klaus Fucking Meine.
Ulrich Jon Roth (who I always thought was Uncle Jon Roth until I finally noticed the spelling) provides some of the strangest vocals ever to his self-penned “Hell Cat,” which sounds more like a lost track from the Crazy World of Arthur Brown than Scorpions.
Roth’s guitar work is impressive, while admittedly strange to anyone who’s more familiar with Mathias Jabbs’ work in the band; he’s bluesier, more fluid, and there are more than a few psychedelic overtones in his solos.
The lyrics are just as hilariously innocent as the band’s later attempts, and perhaps a bit more obvious on the whole “second language” limitations.
Instead of hinting at living in an alcohol haze, they go with “A different life/Than whiskey cola.”
Rather than simply state how the job at the factory sucks, they curious match “Don’t be lazy, man and work off your ass/He’s the boss you gotta do what he says” (pronounced “sass”) together, providing people with a bunch of unnecessary information while still managing to get the idea across.
How they were even able to make all of this sounded phonetically similar is disclosed when Klaus admits the secret on the track “Crying Days:” “Force yourself to use you brain.”
And in true Scorpions fashion, it takes over a minute of hard-rocking and guitar soloing before those words of wisdom are even uttered.
Hell, even the song “Catch Your Train” is essentially back by a never ending solo by Roth, like he’s too much of a ball hog to let Klaus get any lead singer attention.
Aside from the enormously shitty Roth track “Polar Nights” (it’s almost shittily unlistenable), Virgin Killer is a surprisingly good album which managed to give me some newfound appreciation for their career.
And to think that a picture of a naked pre-pubescent girl prevented me from discovering this fact in the past.

Michael Schenker Group - M.S.G.

Back in the early days of high school, I was exposed to the record collection of an older classmate who was well versed in what was then considered to be album oriented rock. In other words, he had several Foghat albums at his disposal.
But within the clutter of second-tier rock acts was a few choice jems. One of those was the first two albums by the Michael Schenker Group.
Michael, the younger brother of Scorpions guitarist Rudolph Schenker, had gone the rounds with the first Scorpions album as well as the vital gunslinger for UFO’s best work. When his work ethic became interfered with his mental problems and substance dependencies, he sought to provide his talents elsewhere. The members of Aerosmith, who at the time were looking for a replacement for Joe Perry (ha!), briefly toyed with the idea of hiring Michael.
They should have known that no one, not even Aerosmith, can get Michael Schenker to play ball.
So Michael started his own band, as tortured guitarists often do, and set out to bring the rock under his own moniker, cleverly abbreviated as M.S.G., the shit that you want to avoid if you’re hungry for Chinese food.
I made a cassette copy of Schenker’s second album (M.S.G.) which was well received by anyone I played it for those who had an appreciation for hard rockin’ bands named after a Flying V welding guitarist.
Borrowing heavily from the same styles that made UFO such a joy, MSG features wonderfully subdued vocalist Gary Barden (who, at times, sounds like a restrained Ian Gillan) and some powerful drumming from the late Cozy Powell.
The emphasis is, of course, the guitar work of Michael Schenker who’s tone and soloing are stellar throughout M.S.G.
Starting with silly-yet-perfect opener “Are You Ready To Rock,” the band follows the call-to-arms with the silly-yet-rocking “Attack Of The Mad Axeman” which was either inspired by Jason Vorhees or the exploits of Schenker himself (get it?). In either case, the song rocks and it’s perfectly ended with an “Are You Ready To Rock” reprise before leading into the synth-aided “On And On,” the album’s highpoint.
Unfortunately, the eight songs on the album are incredibly top-heavy, leaving listeners with a great side one half and a very unmemorable second half. At the same time, those first four songs are so awesome that I’ve spent some time looking for it on cd, leading me once to buy a used copy of it through an online retailer. My excitement was reduced when the package arrived and I found that the retailer had mislabeled their inventory, sending me a McAuley-Schenker Group album (a shitty, early 90’s last gasp with a different line-up and an album titled M.S.G. that makes things even more confusing) instead of my original request for the 1981 offering.
Recently, the expansive collection of a great P2P website enabled me to revisit this lost treasure. What makes it even better is the fact that the file was totally gleaned from a vinyl copy (just like my original Maxell XLII!) complete with needle drops and surface noise.