Time Capsule Clutter

What you see in the photo to the side is a leap year miracle.

Actually, it is the contents of a sealed box that I found in my garage tonight. A reminder of my past that I had sealed in a box, forgotten, and then reminded of when my parents shipped it to me because they didn’t want it cluttering up their joint any longer.

I would have easily forgotten about the box, even after they sent it, but tonight curiosity got the best of me just like it did Brad Pitt in Seven.

There was no human head in my box, just some old music related garbage that I thought I would share it on this day that gives you the opportunity to live 24 hours longer.

As you can see, there are a few band stickers ready for sticking. At one time, I used to cover my stereo speakers with band stickers and the like. You’d get a ton of them if you worked in radio, and my punchy Acculab 4-way speakers that I purchased at K’s Merchandise back in 1983 were covered with ‘em. It was pretty punk rock back in the day, but when I turned into a Yuppie in the mid-90’s, I felt that I needed to do away with such nonsense so I scrapped them for a pair of Bose 301s.

Not that you give a shit about my speakers, I’m just sayin' that these were the stickers left over from when I began to think that my speakers looked tacky with them on it. Now, of course, I wish I still had those Acculabs. I’d blow out a tweeter or midrange speaker, schlep down to Radio Shack (a Tandy company), and buy a replacement.

You can see an awesome Barkmarket sticker (I also have a spare), a Mathew Sweet dinosaur from Altered Beast (got about four of those, all different colors), a Sonic Youth washing machine from, you guessed it, Washing Machine, and the obligatory Jesus Lizard sticker. I loved that band so much that I was too gun shy to put it anywhere. Hell, you could say the same thing about all of those stickers I guess.

Next up is a Beatles pin that I stole from the Wal Mart electronics department on the day The Beatles Anthology I was released. I remembered all of those promotional items that Capitol Records had back in the 60’s and I thought, “I’ll have a bit of that!” Of course, I’ll have to wait a few more years before this button will be worth anything, but I now regret not nicking another one just for good measure.

On the upper right hand corner is a promotional item for the Pixies. It’s a simple black and white postcard of the band, standing in front of a bar that shares their name. This would have been from their Trompe Le Monde record, and it’s the perfect example of a ridiculous expense that serves no purpose. Why Elektra records felt the need to print up hundreds of postcards and ship them to radio stations across the country is beyond me. It in no way provokes radio programmers to think “I should add that new Pixies single this week!” and it’s not eye-catching enough for anyone to save. Instead, I’m sure Elektra added the cost of such dim-witted ideas to the Pixies accounting so that they’re still paying them off today. Even though it wasn’t very eye-catching, I saved it because I love the Pixies.

In the center is the add that Spinal Tap took out in radio trade magazines to hype up Break Like The Wind, the band’s early 90’s reunion album. I thought the ad was hilarious, and they really did hold auditions as part of the promotion. If I recall, Mick Fleetwood won the competition. Incidentally, this piece of paper survived over 20 years, most of which was featured prominently on one of the tom toms on my drum kit.

There were other items found: local band fliers, a Grateful Dead bota bag flask, an official Beatles Yellow Submarine Zippo lighter, etc. But the strangest thing is probably that Squeaky Fromme collage sent to me by a friend. It has nothing to do with music (that is Charlie in the upper right hand corner of the small piece) and I have no idea why I saved it other than my irrational curiosity towards the Manson Family.

Even more inexplicable is why Paul Shaffer plays a keyboard solo during The Pixies’ network television debut on Late Night with David Letterman.