Telemundo Free

It’s moving day, which means that the landlord had to provide me with the same soundtrack as to when I originally moved in: Candlebox. I can’t think of a time in which I actually looked forward to moving. For those of you that thought their only hit “Far Behind” was left far behind in your memory, please stop by and visit him after I’m gone. You’ll discover that it can be 1993, or whenever that piece of shit song was released, and that people with shitty taste in music are still among us. To further prove my point, he’s now listening to the new Rob Thomas album before tucking his selfish, materialistic, egotistical, alcoholic, narrow minded and weak ass off to bed. Night night, for the last time, fuckface.
It's my Mother's birthday...And her birthday card was returned with not enough postage. I buy a card, I put a stamp on it, I put it in the mailbox. How hard is that shit? I have no idea why the thing was returned; it's not like the card was huge. I guess it was a different size and that required someone to actually put it in the sorter by hand. They now want an additional twelve cents to mail it, meanwhile, my Mother won't receive it until after her birthday. My Grandfather worked for the post office. He did the route with his fucking dog in the car, so it's not like those fuckers are working too hard. He also had a guy pull out the odometer cable of his Chevy Citation. He put a lot of miles on his car delivering the mail everyday and he didn't want the warranty on the Citation to run out so quickly. This example of a letter carrier's "honesty" should make you feel real good the next time you find your Hustler arrives ripped and sticky.
By the way, I’ll be without internet for a while so this blog is taking a short rest until I can scrounge up a high speed ISP that will at least wait for the wink before they fuck me in the ass. A pictorial of that event will be featured in next month's Club International, which was my favorite dirty mag back in high school. I guess they've come a long way now since most of 'em feature full on buttfucking rather than the flaccid pretend shit they had when I was growing up. These kids today don't know how good they've got it...